You either get the place or you don’t…

Love it, or hate it, it’s always great to be back in Honkers. 
It’s eight years since we left, yet I still get the ‘bright lights’ frisson of excitement, the moment I get off the plane. It’s when you feel that wall of humidity hit, your hair gives you the real meaning of frizz-on, and that ‘Fragrant Harbour’ smell starts the assaults on your senses. 

Victoria Harbour Hong Kong Sept 2015
And you yell out in fine voice ‘Honey, I’m Home!‘ 
and the polite crowd of Hong Kong Chinese around you, 
smile awkwardly and continue playing on their Iphones. 
‘Oops, sorry, pardon me for my over-exuberance!’

Apple Store – Tsim Sha Tsui, Kowloon
Two minutes in the Hotel check-in line, becomes two hours 
and all because you are handed your room key for two 
and told breakfast is for one. 
You ask whether you can have breakfast for two 
but your name is not on the list, 
so after much checking it is confirmed, with a nod, 
yes, one included breakfast only‘.

and it all comes flooding back…

You are in the land of rules is rules and ‘don’t make a fuss’ 
and of course you come from another place, 
you know the one that puts the customer first…
The one where common sense prevails.
It’s not a match made in paradise
and you ARE making a fuss. 
and OMG more frizz-on. 

Central, Hong Kong
Of course the HK Employee training book says you must adhere to all the rules with absolute conformity, where there are rules, 
but where there are no rules, absolutely anything goes.

Sometimes you don’t quite know whether the rule book is being applied.
 Take these workers climbing up the bamboo scaffolding downtown Central on Saturday night.
Rules or no rules?

Bambozled in Central, Hong Kong
Now in Australia all Tradies would have said 
“cannot” and downed tools days ago for a beer and a barbie.
WorkSafe would have been summoned and they’d have said ‘cannot’ too.
Or what about the Sai Kung Dogs Birthday party?
Where tourists are amazed by the doggy delights at a local cafe.
The uninvited guests stood around licking their lips.

How do I score an invite to your party?
Where the invite clearly said smart casual
and fluffy dogs were dressed in their best collar & ties
to savour the feast.


And the special dog party food kept coming, plate after plate
and of course it’s perfectly ok to have your paws and more on the table…
Rules or no rules?

We head off to relax at our favourite reflexology place
Happy Foot
We’ve found some old loyalty cards in an old wallet
‘Do any of these work?’ we ask
‘We find out’ is the reply.


We finish our foot massages and a sheet of paper is produced.
It shows nine years ago we bought a book of ten foot massages, 
the last time we signed was 2010
‘After today, one free foot massage left’, they tell us
I had to smile
of course it’s the same system
the ‘cannot have breakfast’ and the ‘can have foot massage’
Isn’t it wonderful? 
Gotta love Hong Kong!

‘We’ll be back’ we say…
Don’t know where, don’t know when….

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